We beat Argentina on penalties. I watched the game at home. Thought we were going to lose so I wanted to be alone. But we won. I am happy.

But I am also sad.

There are no words. Is it very naive that I still believe him? That I think he is the victim in all of this. When I found out this morning, in the middle of attending a course, I almost choked. It hurt. I'm in denial. It just can't be true. What happened, Jan? Please answer that question for us.